Intimacy In Marriage

Jul 27, 2022

Intimacy is very important in a marriage. Unfortunately, for most couples, intimacy is about sex— and it is not. You can be intimate and not sexual at all. Husbands get into trouble for this all the time. For example, your wife is playing with your head and stroking your beard while lying next to you on the sofa. She's kissing you, and you are so ready to take it to the next level, only to find out that she's not in a sexual mood. She just needed an intimate moment with you. That's it. This moment will not lead to a sexual encounter. Of course, husbands will be a little bit disappointed, and I, too have experienced my share of these moments.

What it teaches us husbands is that sex and intimacy for our wives are not the same, and often we miss valuable moments to build trust and vulnerability because we misunderstand the two.


Healthy sex life is very important to a marriage. Nothing brings a couple closer than a sexual encounter. Whether it is kissing, touching, foreplay, or the complete sexual act. It helps to build an unbreakable bond together. Something magical happens when husband and wife come together intimately and sexually.

When you have a regular, healthy sex life with your partner, you're actually improving your bond of trust. This happens, in part, because of the powerful oxytocin released during sex. Oxytocin is a hormone that can shape the neural circuitry of trust in humans. This is one of the reasons why people should not practice casual sex. Sex is more than just a physical act.

 "What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh." 1 Corinthians 6:16 (KJV)



Intimacy goes further than the bedroom. As matter of fact, I often tell couples that if they focus on the other areas of their marriage, sexual intimacy will be more enjoyable. You will spend more time out of the bedroom trying to build your marriage and relationship together than in it. This means you have to do most of the work outside of the bedroom to have more time in it. If you master these areas in addition to sexual intimacy, you have something special going on here.

Intimacy is commitment, maturity, dedication, financial literacy, honesty, fidelity, love, honor, affection, respect, romance, security, protection, communication, trust, relationship, friendship, listening, personal development, and spiritual growth. Couples taking these areas seriously will often improve their odds in the bedroom.

Sexual intimacy does not lead to a better marriage, but a better marriage often leads to a better sex life. Your relationship cannot survive without intimacy because intimacy is the foundation of any relationship. This is why a relationship without intimacy on both levels is pretty much doomed for failure. Sure, a relationship can survive without intimacy– but it will become a real struggle for both partners as time goes on. Build friendship, trust, and fidelity, not just sexual intimacy.